Spelling Out Life... with Good Things

I guess I've been posting less of the good things I have going on in my life! :D So here's something good and to be thankful of.

I'm glad to have good friends. Wai Wai, the PERKEB committees, Seniors, classmates, church friends etc.

We had our moments worth remembering :) I went for pedi mani for my birthday, I cooked porridge with Paul, I bought groceries to bless Amy and Tim, I drove people around, I sent the twins to hospital with David, I had fun talking about relationship with Pr Daniel and Amy, I learnt about finance thing with Wai Wai and Amy, I cherish my relationship with Paul, I had good time with Paul's family, I went for reunion dinner with the family. :)

I'm thankful that God is building me to be ready with tons of responsibilities. Although I may be suck at some, but I'm learning. I learnt to take notes (AMAZING), I learnt to decline invitations for some occasions, I learnt to develop certain skills like acting, directing, planning etc. :D

I think I'm beginning to take things lightly now coz I finally spend time with God. :) Gosh, holiday can be a huge factor to pull you away from reality! hahahahha.. I'm now at Psalms 92. :) I miss His voice! But now, i'm learning to tune my brains back to Him. :) Aah well, that's my daddy God. :)

I'm glad that things are going into places too. :) Though there are tons of activities in the next 6 weeks, I find that God is teaching me to stay calm and take things one at a time. :)

I'm a happy girl after thinking about all the pain and struggles I'm going through now :)

Life is good. :)

Give God all the Praise and glory! The Father that protects, shelters, cares and loves me. :) What a faithful God is He. :)

Spelling Out Life... with money

i think I shall start my blog post with some bible verse. :) Not to show how holy I am as a person, but to remind myself about Him for I've been such a forgetful daughter of His.

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ!

I hereby, Joy, still am finding putting behind lust of flesh a huge struggle. Lust of money is one of it. (I'll speak more about other lusts some other time)

Lust of money somehow places me on a pedestal of how vulnerable I am without it, rather than faith itself. I honestly say the level of commitment in my current relationship is also based on it. Not to say that I'm like Paris Hilton or anak Dato' that spends on Guess, Charles and Keith or Coach products every month, but I still wish that The BF have a secure income and provide me a security of stable finance monthly. I guess it's a typical girl thing to hope for stability in finance and not lose out on current trends huh?

Until last wednesday, someone challenged me to see beyond financial stability on this earth. Brother Mark and his wife ministered to us tremendously, i might add, that commitment to love and grow for His glory as a couple should be the ultimate goal for the The BF and I, because only then, the phrase "for better and for worst" will make sense to both of us. Won't it be weird if one says to be together forever, for the better part of life but not long down the road, he/she flees when the worst time aka family breakdown happened? If financial stability is the key that makes me hold on to him and HIM, instead of THE GOAL, I guess I failed as a partner and as a Christian believer. Never worship anything else other than HIM alone.

hmmm.. Writing this down is really breaking parts of my heart and I know why. Financial stability has been one of the cores in my life and it's not easy to let it go and see how far God will bring me.

...God, I'm sorry. :'(

It's unimaginably hard, God. Not being able to have what others may have, being scared that I'll learn to compare my married life with others', being scared that I'll not be happy just to have You in my life.

"...What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul?"

I'm sorry Lord. Teach me again. Bring me back to You. For I really don't want to forfeit my soul over earthly stability and lose You as my Father. Teach me to be glad in You in any sorts of financial breakdown. Teach me to be close to You, I pray, amen.

"...What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul?"

Joy, what good is it to lose your soul? Have you not learnt that My ways are not of the world's? Have you not remembered that My ways are beyond the fears that you carry? Let not you lose your footings in this world and forget My providence and grace that is extended to you through Jesus Christ. Let you not forget the faithfulness I've given you for the past days of your life. Let you not forget of the blessings I've given you for the past days of your life. Let not you forget of the love I've given to you through Lord Jesus Christ. Let not you forget My Words for they are true and alive, and I know you remember each and every thing that I've shown you. and I know you remember them now. Count every blessings and multiply them by ten, that's how big is My love for you in your future. I'll never leave you nor forsake you. Call upon my name and I'm here with you. Emmanuel, Abba Father.

amen.

Spelling Out Life... with Influence

"Joy, you are My beautiful child. Never once I leave you. I will carry you far beyond your imagination. I will cause My sweet fragrance around you for you to experience that I am alive in you and people will see them. I will cause the fragrance of influence be upon you and with this influence, I will bring people into your life and they'll see My glory and know Me. I will bring you higher than you ever thought about. But you need to discern very well and walk with Me, Joy. All that I give you is good but you need to walk with Me. Grow with me and you'll go far, further than before. But be very careful. Never mistaken grace with fame. I love you, Joy. You are my daughter. Walk with me."

Spelling Out Life... with PERKEB Seniors

hah!

I'm emotional now. Period is here, what to do. Anyway, memandangkan saya tengah emotional, I shall post an emotional post. T.T (sedih sudah)

To all my seniors:

1. Su-Jian Koay:

You've been so great to me. Thank you for being cool when I nearly cried in the car. LOL. I'll never forget that part. (T.T) Thank you for the emotional and spiritual support the whole 2 years that I've known you. You're one awesome senior that cooks, counsels, jokes around, wise and protects. Always remember that you are AWWEEEESOOMMMEEEEEEE (barney, HIMYM).

2. Caroline Lee:

The senior of the same species, I look up to as a big sister... Thank you for your love, support, concern, lame jokes, weird driving, great laughter, hospitality and your prayer. You are one beautiful woman, a full grown woman who knows what she wants in life. Live up to your calling, kay. Because His work in you is still moving and working for the whole world to know Him.

3. Benjamin Chan:

A subtle character but a strong faith you have there. Thank you for blessing me with your listening ears, support, care, hospitality and love. I see that the Lord has been faithful to you, just speak forth of His grace and faithfulness to those who haven't heard Him. He will carry you through the words that He has prepared for them. Just know that He will finish what He has first called you to be.

4. Isabel Lo:

the woman with a knowledgeable mind and a loving heart. Thank you for your companionship and love throughout the whole 2 years of knowing you. I love our crazy and sad moments together. Thank you for supporting me emotionally with your mum's amazing story back in first year. Thank you for being just great in helping me building up the characters of the junior debaters. Thank you for being you when we're together. You are one beautiful character that He always use in the littlest thing you do. Be daring in being different, that's all that I can say. Just be daring.

5. Davin:

loud crazy one, hehe. Thank you for faithfully serving me when I first came to UKM, bringing me to church and all. Thank you for the heart-to-heart session in the van. that is priceless. You are priceless. continue to be faithful because you are meant to be one.

6. Evon:

lol. i doubt that you read this but i'm glad that you have blessed me with your funny comments about so many things! thank you for your love stories... heheehheheheeheh....

7. Danny:

orang lawak. hahaahahaha.. jum kita lagu HSM time karaoke lagi! hahaahahahahaahah.. thank you for always bringing out the life out of everyone! you are the joy of the place where He puts you to be.

8. Taiko:

You are one faithful character. Seek and you will find. Open up your heart and never doubt. A faithful man will just live by faith and know that he is in good hand. You have an abundant future, always believe in it. thank you for always being there for me. thank you for loving me as a sister. thank you for always lighten up my day with your random comments. :) Don't forget our pinky promise!!!!!

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to all the UKM seniors, thank you for your presence in my life. to the names I've not mentioned, I cant write more. Crying badly now. Thank you.

thank you.

I pray that the Good Lord will always break you and mold you and also discipline you and love you. I pray that He will strengthen you and give you all the wisdom that you need for your future undertakings. I pray that you continue to walk with Him and bless Him with whatever that He has given you. I love you guys with my heart and soul. You are my blessings. You are my treasures and I thank Him for all the moments we have had together. Thank You Lord Jesus for all the beautiful souls that You have blessed me.

Amen.

Spelling Out Life... with More Responsibilities

Matthew 25:14-30 (New Living Translation)

Parable of the Three Servants

¹⁴ “Again, the Kingdom of Heaven can be illustrated by the story of a man going on a long trip. He called together his servants and entrusted his money to them while he was gone. ¹⁵ He gave five bags of silver^[a] to one, two bags of silver to another, and one bag of silver to the last—dividing it in proportion to their abilities. He then left on his trip.

¹⁶ “The servant who received the five bags of silver began to invest the money and earned five more. ¹⁷ The servant with two bags of silver also went to work and earned two more. ¹⁸ But the servant who received the one bag of silver dug a hole in the ground and hid the master’s money.

¹⁹ “After a long time their master returned from his trip and called them to give an account of how they had used his money. ²⁰ The servant to whom he had entrusted the five bags of silver came forward with five more and said, ‘Master, you gave me five bags of silver to invest, and I have earned five more.’

²¹ “The master was full of praise. ‘Well done, my good and faithful servant. You have been faithful in handling this small amount, so now I will give you many more responsibilities. Let’s celebrate together!^[b]’

²² “The servant who had received the two bags of silver came forward and said, ‘Master, you gave me two bags of silver to invest, and I have earned two more.’

²³ “The master said, ‘Well done, my good and faithful servant. You have been faithful in handling this small amount, so now I will give you many more responsibilities. Let’s celebrate together!’

²⁴ “Then the servant with the one bag of silver came and said, ‘Master, I knew you were a harsh man, harvesting crops you didn’t plant and gathering crops you didn’t cultivate. ²⁵ I was afraid I would lose your money, so I hid it in the earth. Look, here is your money back.’

²⁶ “But the master replied, ‘You wicked and lazy servant! If you knew I harvested crops I didn’t plant and gathered crops I didn’t cultivate, ²⁷ why didn’t you deposit my money in the bank? At least I could have gotten some interest on it.’

²⁸ “Then he ordered, ‘Take the money from this servant, and give it to the one with the ten bags of silver. ²⁹ To those who use well what they are given, even more will be given, and they will have an abundance. But from those who do nothing, even what little they have will be taken away. ³⁰ Now throw this useless servant into outer darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.’

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at times like this, somehow I know that God teaching me a lot of new responsibilities for my future growth. I know not what are they for but for now, I'm taking the role of leadership and teaching.

As the new semester takes place in September, 2 new responsibilities are added in, compared to last year. I honestly do not know how I'll handle my time and my mind. Time management is not my forte but I guess I have to learn to separate what's important and what's not.

Lord Lord, all that I ask for is Your only Hand to carry me through.

I believe that all the work that You've given me is a blessing instead of burden.

In jesus name, I can do all these.

Amen.

Spelling Out Life... with Day 28

Sunday. 13 Feb.

Pr Daniel shared his love story in church. I was actually seeking for answers from God through the service and I knew He answered it in an adorable way, the way I knew it is God's work in my life. :)

Pr Dan spoke bout God impressed a desire/thought in his heart bout Aunty Sally and vice versa. It was God's intention for them to grow together through different tough, happy, sad, crazy times. It was really the God that I'm serving now was the one behind their love story.

I know now what is the next step. Pray and fast. :)

God works in His plans, not mine.

As time passes by, I pray that His love continues to draw each one of us together for His glory. :)

be blessed!

Joy.

Spelling Out Life... with 2011

Lord,

This year, I commit my college council unto Your hands. I'm scared I don't know how to run some events and what not but carry me through, please? I'm stupid, i'm slow, I'm nobody but please make Yourself shown by using me in my weaknesses.

This year, I commit my studies unto Your hands. I'm scared I might mess up again. Give me a heart of understanding and the drive to study so that I can be a testimony in the eyes of the lecturers. Let them find favour in me.

Lord,

This year, I hope that You'll always challenge my unnecessary attitudes so that I may become more like You. Give me a heart of servanthood, wisdom, humility, self-control and discipline. Break my heart so that I always put You first in everything I do. Remind me daily of Your love, oh Lord.

Lord,

1 thing I ask, please break me and mold me according to Your will. Never let me go. I want to know You more.

Lord,

whatever personal life i'm having now kan God, let me see You work in the midst of it. Please please please give me a heart of discernment to know what is right or wrong or what is good for me and so on. AGAIN, i'm pretty much stupid, but please teach me wisdom in the decisions that I make daily.

LASTLY,

Lord,

I commit my 2011, my daily activities, my studies, my family, my friends, my relationships, my heart, my mind, my soul unto Your hands. Break me into pieces and shape me into somebody that You want me to become. Thank You Lord Jesus.

I ask that Your Spirit gives me the courage, the will, patience, understanding, wisdom, joy, peace, love, goodness, kindness, grace, faith and support the whole year through.

In Jesus name,

Amen.

Spelling Out Life... with Valentine

"If you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. And if they don't, they never were." - Kahlil Gibran.

I've let it go, so many times but it comes back pretty much all the time when I need it most. :) Last night was another mind challenging session but it was awesome. I never knew this quote came into my mind! Of all the places and time! Heh. So let's just wait for the right timing. Even if it adds another 5 years to it, I just hope I'm ready for it. Dear Lord, you know my heart and do carry me through these coming years. :) Amen.

Spelling Out Life... with Jesus

I accidentally saw a page by this Indonesian on Facebook, it said in Bahasa Indonesia that Jesus HAS to be crucified. I agreed to that. Even the Pharisees knew He had to be crucified because He was different and that scared him. That Indonesian created a page to condemn Jesus, stated that Jesus HAD to be crucified, He DID die like the rest of the human being and what kind of God died? :) I figure that guy didn't read the scripture well enough...



Dear Lord,
I ask that You speak to him through his discovery to You.
:)
In Jesus name i pray,
amen.

Spelling Out Life... with Decisions Decisions

I'm still yet to plan out Academic's events for 2010/2011...

God Lord, please take over...

I'm sending in a proposal tomorrow...

Guide me through every steps and decisions..

:)

In Jesus' name,

amen

Spelling Out Life... with a Broken yet Hopeful Heart

"Most of all, God has a desire to bless you with spiritual power from heaven-the authority, ability, and opportunity to do something beyond your imagination."

God... I'm broken inside now. Actually, I don't. I just think that I am.. Hrmm..

I find comfort in Your name. I find peace in Your name. I find gratefulness in Your name.

I'm just down today. You know very well, why.

I don't blame you for it. but I know You made it happened for a reason.

At the end of the day, I think You want me to focus on my family.

They are the ones who stood by my craziest stupidest times.

I love him, God. Please watch over him.

Give him strength, peace and joy throughout the days.

Give his family the same peace, joy and strength too, Lord.

You know our cry or our happy times.

I think I know You reign above all.

I know it's all for Your glory...

although it breaks our hearts.

it breaks our hearts.

but You're still a God that is faithful and full of wonder.

:)

God, it breaks our hearts badly. sigh.

this is for you, uncle Jo.

I love you so much.

xx

your foolish niece

Spelling out life... with worries

it's creeping me out again.
it's the end of January and I am supposed to get the MKK designs out to the shops.
but again, finance is again my great issue.
If I have the money, I'd send them out and print all!
but I dont and MKK's account doesn't. I need the money, Lord.













LORD, I KNOW YOU COULD HEAR ME NOW, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
GIVE ME APPROX RM1000 FOR THE PUBLICITY DEPARTMENT?


Heavenly Dad, keep my worries in Your hands.
I trust that You are in control.
I seek for Your help. In this week, I need to get the designs out and I'm penniless.
I seek for Your grace and mercy upon me and MKK.
I don't want to fail you Lord.
I ask for abundance of blessings coming down on the designs' production.
Dad, keep me cool from breakdowns.
In Jesus name, amen.