Saturday, December 31, 2011

Spelling Out Life... with end of 2011

New year is here! Yey! ^^

I just want to say thank You Lord for being such a faithful and living God in my life for the past one year. I experienced more love from friends and family in times of joy, suffering and sorrow. Though life wasn't easy last year, You have carried me far beyond my imagination. :)

If I could recall, I'd try to list down all the blessings that You have given and ushered me, just to give You an offering of praise and thanksgiving:

1. You gave my great seniors that are continuously blessing me with support and encouragement.
2. You gave me strength, support and joy to go through JAKSA though I cried so many tears along the way.
3. You walked with me in times of quietness and emptiness.
4. You gave me chances to meet new people from different workplace, different colleges, different states and different countries.
5. You gave me a sense of belonging in a family through Paul's family and my own big family back in Miri, when I needed it most.
6. You gave me hope when I had issues financially.
7. You gave me courage to speak of your Grace to people that I may not ever see again.
8. You opened up opportunities for me to serve you in the children's ministry, though I thought of declining to take up this ministry (and i still am)
9. You spoke to me in the busy-ness and in times quiet.
10. You carried me academically, gave me courage to speak boldly in presentations and gain favour in my lecturers.
11. You taught me management when I was chosen to be General Secretary, which I never ever thought before.
12. You brought me to bless different people of different religion as how You wanted me to learn to love.
13. You opened an opportunity for me to share Your truth to different people.
14. You encouraged me through my CF, ICC members, classmates, Uni friends, other friends and family members.
15. You taught me how to love others though it was hard for me to swallow.
16. You taught me grace and humility though it was the hardest for me to do and I'm still suck at it..
17. You opened up opportunity to bless my classmates with prayer and support.
18. You gave me people to help me through emotionally and mentally. :)
19. You were there to remind me of the shitty things I did and what I needed to learn.
20. You brought me to places I've never been before in my entire life.
21. You brought me people to bless me with prophecies and words of encouragement.
22. You spoke with me every day and You were never quiet.

Above all, You carried me and I knew it all along. :)

Thank You Daddy God for being there for me. Thank You for being my best mentor in relationship. Thank You for being faithful when I wasn't being one. Thank you for providing me grace, support, love and care. Thank You Abba Father.

Thank You Daddy. :)

I love you for being just an awesome God and Father and Friend to me. :)

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Spelling Out Life... with home 2

I went back Miri with the grace of the Lord. I had the opportunity to go back after months of praying for it. :) thank You Daddy God.

Spelling Out Life... with Influence

"Joy, you are My beautiful child. Never once I leave you. I will carry you far beyond your imagination. I will cause My sweet fragrance around you for you to experience that I am alive in you and people will see them. I will cause the fragrance of influence be upon you and with this influence, I will bring people into your life and they'll see My glory and know Me. I will bring you higher than you ever thought about. But you need to discern very well and walk with Me, Joy. All that I give you is good but you need to walk with Me. Grow with me and you'll go far, further than before. But be very careful. Never mistaken grace with fame. I love you, Joy. You are my daughter. Walk with me."

Spelling Out Life... with Faith

i miss my daddy God. I really miss God.

Spelling Out Life... with lost and not found

I'm currently at the stage where I deliberately run away from the work of God, the grace of God and the love of God.

If you want to know how I feel or think, here is the list:

1. I'm lost. spiritually.
2. I lost vision of what a woman of God should be like.
3. I lost vision of what a Christian is.
4. I lost the strength that wakes me up every morning.
5. I'm sad that I'm not serving in church at the moment.
6. I'm sad that I don't feel joy in doing anything.
7. I feel empty.
8. I'm going crazy inside.
9. I'm down.
10. I feel broken every day.
11. I don't anticipate for anything. nothing interests me anymore.
12. I miss worshiping God in an awesome wondrous manner.
13. I feel dead inside.
14. I don't experience the fruit of the Spirit and that hurts me.
15. I feel empty.
16. I miss God.
17. I'm dried up.
18. I feel as if I live to waste oxygen.

I'm at the stage where I want to go home and see my daddy God and say "Daddy, I'm tired. Carry me to my room, can?'' and i dont know what to do now.

Spelling Out Life... with Ipu Beridang

She left on the 29th of November 2011, the day of my close friend's birthday. :)

I love you Ipu. You are one awesome figure. :)

Spelling Out Life... with Pastor Kid


I'm officially a PK now. what is PK? Look at the title. HAHAHAHAHAH..

Never in my entire life that I come across that "title". LOL. Used to be "Anak Tuan/Anak Polis/Anak Boss" then now, "Anak Pastor".. heheheheheh.. It's interesting to know, of course.