Spelling Out Life... with Graduation

I want to thank:

1. my parents for patiently giving me money every semester
2. Paul for giving me money, aid, support and attention everyday for the past 3 years.
3. my CF friends: Su-Jian, Nernny etc etc. batch of 2009-2013, you guys are the core of support in prayers and actions.
4. my TESL friends: Ina, Qila, Luke, Ku, Pian, Hasif, and Reza and the rest of the classmates. Ina, please know that our 5 years together mean a lot to me. The Geng Tujuh, please know that I love you guys for standing by me in 3 and half years. :)
5. my ICC friends: Daniel Singh and the family, Amy and Tim, Bobby, Alex, Charlene, Jon, Jen, Carolyn, Lex, Judith, Eto, Abraham, Sharon, Pr Ben etc etc... thank you for giving me joy through all my doubts and sorrows.
6. my ex roommates: Ah Saw, Esther and most importantly, Yee Yeong (Wai Wai): You girls watch me grow. Thank you for putting up on my ridiculous character. I love you Wai Wai, and I thank you for not giving up on me.
7. my KTHO friends: Syiqah, wan, nana, JAKSA KTHO, thanks for teaching me a good life.
8. my UKM-Faculty & non-ukm friends from Selangor, Sarawak, Melaka, Johor, Kelantan, Pahang, Perak etc etc.. You have been a great friend to me. God made me know you and blessed me with your love and care.
9. most importantly: God. He made this happen. He made me happen.

Spelling out Life... with the angry sour puss

I am angry at myself. I wish I could die. Leaving my faith for a month is making me a different person that people say "that's not the joy i know". I'm pretty much fucked up inside. I'm angry for no apparent reason. I HATE myself right now. I blame others for my own faults. I hate myself for being so stupid and shallow. I hate myself for being so annoying. I hate myself for being a burden to many. I hate everything that is bugging me. I am so pissed at everyone and everything. I am a loner. I want to be alone. I want to fuck my life. i love swearing. i have been swearing a lot lately. I feel very sien. SIEN. mcb. Im pissed. leaving the big man up there is fucking my life up. I cant even say his name or even name him as someone i should be looking up to.

ahhhhhh.. mcb! screw me. screw everyone around me. i hate this post. fucking ass post.