Spelling out Life... with 3 deaths and 3 Weddings

Hey guys,

I've been having some rough patches lately and they weren't kind to me most of the time. I guess that is what we all need once in a while...

I know some of you have not known this, but I just had my third funeral in 10 months last month on the 6 Sept. It is still painful and sad for me, not only I lost someone who watched me grow from birth, but I lost someone whom I dearly loved, my uncle Joe. He succumbed to nose cancer but I believe God restored his soul along the way.

SIGH. 

I still am mourning. Up to now.

But God is good. Although it is pretty hard to acknowledge that right now. 

God is good.

You know how I know?

He added unto us 3 weddings to replace the tears we shed.

My sister's wedding was in July.

My brother's wedding was a day after Uncle Joe's death.

My cousin's wedding was a day after Uncle Joe's burial.

Yet, the weekend that Uncle Joe's passing, it was freaking shitty hard. I had emotional breakdown for a week or two after the funeral and the weddings. My brains can't handle two distinct emotions in a good one day. Imagine, funeral during the day, wedding at night and the day after. It was insane. I really thank God for a new month, a new day and patient companies who stood by me and cried with me. 

I miss you, uncle.

Here's a gift for you because it was emotionally hard to give it to you the day when you reach heaven and meet Daddy God, Ipu Kerato and Ipu Beridang. :(

Smile, daughter, smile

out of the wheels again, yet

thoughts that bristles and tingle, that smile,

 captivates me all the time

and it kept me.

Alive. 

For all the time I had.

Alive is what your smiles made me.

Please, in all you do,

smile, daughter, smile.

Even when i'm not on the wheels again

it kept me.

Alive.

For all the time you have.